life!

life they say is wierd. i did prefer 2 use the word that life is repeat, boring, dull, cynic n maybe it mocks u . u wonder y u? no i wont say y me - - - but the temptation is too much 2 resit.
well such is life and @ such moments u tend 2 cling more so in particular than in parts to what is urs only urs by right! 4 the simple reason that it pains 2 see someone leave u.
am i hurt?. a no would be a lie.
i duuno y i m hurt! i knew this was comming. if it wouldnt have come from some1 else i myself wud have initiated it than y does it hurt so much y does it pain beyond understanding.
plain bcos wen it started it was supoosed 2 be well it didnt start there was no starting and that is precisely y its hurting as its gotta ending. funny the answers i seek the most lie within me.
no shit! still is it that elusive? is it tat precious or was it just a dream ?
well dreams dont materialise. some1 may hit back how does it matter 2 u ? ur dreams r in pencil anyways? ya true but i will erase them wid my tears n my time or rather wid time if tat means sth 2 some1 .
and than i see myself so lucky . yes lucky! y 1 may ask? well bcos although i have still not got in touch but i say i have a such strong support system, which my indiffernce may suggest, i have taken 4 granted but here's where matters stand undisclosed, unrefuted, unabjudicated unjudged, unbiased and un-wahtever. have i become so maddened by my own pain or say loss that i do not see things as they r on the other side ?
i m bleesed but m not sure if others are?i ask r 'You'?
i do not do charity but 2day even as my loss seems unnbeareable i manage 2 spare a thought abt it maybe bcos i truly care. abt that someone's condition. i duuno if such friends n support systems exist everywhere and if i didnt pull off the inevitable it was bcos somewhere within me i was aware of some1 else loss n or maye pain rather heplessness selfguilt n disamy the way i felt-- i believe it should hurt n y wont it? was it not true?
i doono wat my role is or rather i know wat i want to do but doono if tats acceptable 2 u yes i m asking 'You' above all 2 life.
as a cynic who returns 2 where he came from all i have gotta 2 say is
"love-life or rather love and life!"

PS: A WISE (WO)MAN IS ONE WHO HAS THE INNER COURAGE TO RECOGNISE AND APPROACH ONE'S TRUE FRIEND IN TIMES OF NEED FOR THE TRUE FRIEND WILL ALWAYS WAIT!